Kosher Food? We got both kinds! Manischewitz and Rubashkin!

A few years ago, I wrote a post to my student pulpit trying to explain the problems of Rubashkin meat and the AgriProcessors company in Postville, Iowa. I knew full well that, in my small congregation, probably only 3 or 4 families out of 45 kept kosher to any degree, but I wrote it anyways, thinking 'Hey, maybe people will think about what they're eating'.

I've been following the Rubashkin scandal for years now. Which one, you ask? The one where their shechita is cruel to animals? Their below industry standard pay and worker conditions? Their slow monopolization of the entire kosher meatpacking industry? Or their demolishing the way of life in a small Iowa town? Rubashkin is pretty much synonymous with all that is shonder. (Is that how it's spelled?)

Back then, in 2004, I suggested to my congregation to avoid eating Rubashkin beef, not knowing that Agriprocessors sold beef under the labels Aaron’s Best, Aaron’s Choice, European Glatt, Nevel, Shor Habor, Rubashkin’s, Supreme Kosher, and David’s (I've eaten 5 of those). I suggested for chicken they switch to Empire, which is still a good alternative, or Wise Organic. But for beef, the options are limited.

Hebrew National is a good option, yet a lot of observant Jews are unhappy with the standards kept by triangle-k. Responding to a student's claim that Hebrew National had switched from it's own hechsher to the triangle-k, one of my rabbaim once remarked 'Solving your kashrut problem with triangle-k is like solving your day-care problem with Michael Jackson'. I don't necessarily agree, but you gotta admit, that is pretty funny.

Regarding their monopolization and it's affect on the rest of the kosher world, the Forward reported

The company's business model has been economically successful. AgriProcessors is the only kosher slaughterhouse in America producing both beef and poultry. While AgriProcessors has been expanding steadily, its closest competitor in the poultry industry, Empire Kosher, recently fired employees and cut back operations. Union leaders at Empire Kosher said that the cutbacks were necessary because Empire pays its lowest-ranking unionized employees close to $3 more an hour from the outset than AgriProcessors' lowest employees, and provides full benefits.

So what's a kosher, social justice-y yid to do? I couldn't go vegetarian. That seems unfair. I grew up not keeping kosher. I've given up so much for this God of mine, but hamburgers too? No way. I suppose I could just start eating only chicken, but, man, that's a tough sacrifice too.

On the East Coast, it seems J.W. Treuth & sons provides kosher meat from their own packing facilities, certified by Star-K. Lastly, I looked on Wise Organic's website; they list under the Beef section the hopeful 'Coming soon'. Not soon enough for me.

BTW, big props to failed messiah and kol raash gadol for writing outstanding posts about Rubashkin abuses. Now if there were only alternatives so I could have some guilt-free brisket.

UPDATE- the Failed Messiah himself gave me two good alternates for kosher stuff:

http://www.premiumkoshermeats.com/
http://www.kosherbison.com/generic1.html;$sessionid$ZMFDKJAAABA4HTZENUGUTIWPERWRJPX0

Of course, the latter is for bison, if you're into that.

I'm feeling self-concious; this is my manifesto

The other day I was watching 'Californication', a truly terrible television show that a friend of mine recommended that I can't stop watching. In the show, Ducovny goes on a rant about blogs watering down the intellectual process and posing as pseudo-writing. In addition, the internet and internet-speak have pared down the English language to a series of acronymical babble: LOL, BRB, etc.

So take this as a disclaimer for those who haven't already noticed: I'm no writer. I'm not posing as a writer. Someday, I might write a book. I will write carefully. I will use a dictionary. I will hire an editor. I might collect my thoughts and cull through them with precision. Until then, I will ramble about things that annoy me, recent sporting events that have no bearing on real life, and sudden flashes of frustration about my selected religious expression. But don't think I'm doing it because I think I'm a 'writer'. I'll be the first to admit: I haven't the foggiest idea what I'm doing. One day, I just decided to write. Someday, I might stop. Till then, I'll do my best to make sense on occasion. Seacrest out.

L'Shunah Tuvah Bubbele

... As my bubbie would pronounce it ('Straight outta Poland'). Everyone go out and have a heckuva year in 5768. Purge those sins, return ye backsliding children, and don't forget that if you come halfway, then the Big Hashem-ster will come the rest of the way for you. And don't forget to floss.

Oh yeah. And hey, keep on reading the Radical Cleric. I'm not feeling the love, people. In fact, since the clearly un-funny Transgendered Bracha Throwdown, I sense my readership has dropped to possibly the low single digits. C'mon, mom, tell Uncle Shecky to give me a bookmark; last year I comp-ed him for High Holidays...

AIPAC, Foxman, and Bush- Just because they all suck does not mean they are in league together

This is something of a re-post from a comment I wrote on jewschool's post from my friend Kol Ra'ash Gadol regarding the NPR Terry Gross 'Fresh Air' point-counterpoint with Stephen Walt and Abe Foxman, which you can catch here.

I agree with Kol Ra'ash that Abe Foxman sounds like a douchebag. More importantly, by his tilting the ADL in the last 10 years away from focusing on defending the rights of all racial, ethnic and religious groups, and focusing instead on defending the Jews, he's really proven to be not only a douchebag, but also a really lousy leader for the Jewish people. Are we so helpless we need a 501c3 that exists solely to refute anti-semitic claims? I know the ADL still does defend the rights of other slandered minority groups, but all I hear about in the past few years is their impassioned defense of the Jews. I'd rather we continued to work in coalition with other minority groups and all work together to end racist hatred of all shapes and sizes.

BUT, more to Kol Ra'ash's point: Walt does make a good point that AIPAC exerts a lot of influence on Washington and that it may not be such a good thing. AIPAC doesn't represent a fair cross-section of US Jewish opinion on Israel and that leads me to feel that when they get criticized publicly for their influence, they deserve it. The US and Israel are both mostly righteous but flawed moral-political states. Their attitudes and relationship can serve sometimes as a system of checks and balances. When Bush I threatened to pull loan guarantees from Israel for building settlements, it was roundly attacked by the Jewish community and AIPAC. But it was an important act: an increase in settlements is detrimental to making peace with the Palestinians.

HOWEVER, Walt undoes any gains in his argument (or at least what I heard on Fresh Air) when he suggests the Israel lobby drove the US to invade Iraq. From day one of the administration the Bush government began to build a case for war in Iraq; the doctored up argument at the UN by Colin Powell, the flimsy CIA and NSA reports to Congress... AIPAC doesn't nearly have the money or power to get Bush II to pull all that stuff together. Bush saw Iraq as a threat, as his father's unfinished business, as a nice little profitable oil opportunity, and a chance to expand US influence in the Middle East by planting a pro-US regime. Pleasing the Israel lobby is an ancillary benefit, at best.

To miss the forest for the trees like that, Walt and Mearschlizzer's thesis comes off to me as pseudo-intellectual dreck at best and veiled anti-semitism at worst.

Avinu Malkeinu, Score us some goals

Great post from my favorite sports blog deadspin about Israel's defeat at the hands of England in the Euro 2008 qualifier this past shabbos. I can't say I was surprised, although Israel did pull a scoreless tie when they played at Ramat Gan. The loss means Israel probably needs a win against powerhouse Russia or the current Group E leader Croatia in upcoming games just to make the field of 16. Israel has never qualified for the European Championship; Israel qualified for the World Cup only once, in 1970.

I've pulled for Israel in all things sport since I could first fake my way through the words of 'Hatikva', which is quite possibly the most depressing National Anthem ever written. My friends and I gathered around the tube every Saturday night motzash to watch Israel best basketball team, Maccabi Tel Aviv, make like a shochet on its way to winning the European Championship. But that was by buying lots of non-yids to help win. An all-Israeli team hasn't won at much in international sports. I mean, shouldn't we at least be dominant in shooting, what with the compulsory conscription and frequent wars and all.

Anyhow. Regardless of this whole loss, I would like to give a shout out to Israeli striker Toto Tammuz. He was abandoned by his Nigerian football-player father in Israel and was adopted by an Israeli. He now plays for my favorite club, Beitar Yerushalayim, and has 10 goals in 18 games. If the KBH can't fenagle the Chosen People into Euro 2008, maybe Toto can do the will of the Borei in God's staid.

Uncontrovertable Proof of the Existance of God

An all-in-one beer brewing device from Gizmodo. I mean, could anything be better? I agree with the muslims: God is great.

Props to my man Zac Johnson for pointing this out.

Ovadia Yosef has left the building

Rabbi Ovadia Yosef, former Chief Sephardi Rabbi of Israel, a Gadol of Torah, who has written voluminously on Jewish Law and has been a source of reason and leniency in the face of a growing trend towards absolutist orthodox stringency, has finally lost his freakin' mind.

In his weekly parsha-address, Rav Ovadia said:

"Is it any wonder if, heaven forbid, soldiers are killed in a war?" he said, "when they don't observe the Sabbath, they don't observe the Torah, they don't pray every day, they don't put on phylacteries every day. Is it any wonder that they're killed? It's no wonder."

It's not the first time Rav Ovadia has said some ridiculous bull sh*t. The article also cites that he blamed Katrina on Bush's support for the Gaza pullout and that he cursed Ariel Sharon with illness for initiating the disengagement plan.

This is the same guy who, back in the 80's, cited pikuach nefesh (saving a life) as to why it was OK to cede land for peace, at a time when no religious leaders would dare suggest giving back an inch of the Holy land. Rav Ovadia also gave a lenient ruling to a meat restaurant in Israel, granting it kosher status despite the fact that it would, on occasion, serve ice cream to customers in-the-know, on the basis that if he did not, the restaurant would go whole-hog traif (pun certainly intended).

It's so sad to see this man say such bizarre things. Ovadia Yosef at one time was the only rabbi to be pro-peace with Palestinians, and this while representing Sephardic Israelis, a typically right-wing group. All his earlier work, both political and legal, is going to be eclipsed by these inane ramblings. So hey, fellow clerics out there, no matter how bad your High Holiday sermon is, at least it won't offend millions of widows and orphans. I hope.

BTW, the AP wire title was 'Rabbi: Non-believing soldiers die', which is inaccurate based on the quote: plenty of Jews believe in God, they just don't believe in wrapping Tefillin. Hey, we Jews might be meshuggenuh for believing that you'll get killed for forgetting to say Minchah, but being smited for not believing? That's just goyish.